Hey Terra! Parent Forum
Vol. I, Issue 1 February Newsletter February 3, 2005

Welcome to the
First Hey Terra Parent Forum Newsletter

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About this Newsletter

The Hey Terra! Parent Forum Newsletter helps you build healthier relationships with your teenage sons and daughters. This free newsletter features parenting tips, letters from parents about their teens, letters from teens about their parents, and a schedule of events where parents and teens can hear Annie Fox live.

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February Parenting Article – When Love is in the Air: Helping your teens when they’re feeling “crushed”

by Annie Fox, M.Ed.

If you notice that your teen is just not acting like him or herself, don’t be shy, ask what’s going on. But make sure you do it in a caring way so it sounds like a friendly invitation to talk, not an interrogation with a prosecutor.
If you’ve walked into a supermarket or a drugstore chain in the past week you’ve been hit by sumptuous displays of hearts and flowers. Yep, Valentine’s Day is fast approaching and that means Spring isn’t far behind. A lot has changed since someone noted that “In Spring a young man’s fancy turns to love” but just ask any teacher and he or she will probably report that balmy weather (and more revealing clothing) still has the same effect on guys and girls today – when love is in the air everyone wants to feel the magic.

This is the time of year I am most likely to receive emails (sent to “Hey Terra”, my online persona) like these from teens who wish they had a boyfriend or a girlfriend...

Continue reading the rest of the article...

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Letters from Parents

This section features letters sent to Annie by parents. This one describes the kind of problems that can happen at the other end of the romantic spectrum when parents find their teenage sons or daughters getting 'too much' attention from admirers.

“Should I let a 17 year old boy date my 13 year old?”

Dear Annie,

I really need some advice before I make a decision regarding my 13 year old daughter and the 17 year old boy whom she likes. He calls many times during the day — including always at 7 am and 11 pm — every day, brings her gifts and flowers. I don’t think it is appropriate for a boy that age to be interested in someone 13. My daughter says they are “just friends, not dating” and that he is her best friend. She refuses to end the relationship. I know I cannot watch her 24/7. Am I making a mountain out of a molehill?

Worried Mom

Dear Worried Mom,

You’re right to be concerned. It’s your responsibility to keep your daughter safe. It feels questionable for a 17 year old boy to be “just friends” with a 13 year old girl, but the “many calls during the day” the gifts, flowers, etc, are clear signs that this boy is romantically attached to your daughter. You need to tell your daughter how you feel and let her know that this is going to end. Don’t be afraid to set limits and stick to them. You are the adult here! If she continues to “refuse” to end the relationship, then you talk with the boy and tell him that it’s over. You do not want him calling emailing, or visiting your daughter any more. And you can tell him why. This is your child and you don’t need anyone’s permission to do what you believe is in her best interests. I hope this helps.

In friendship,


Got a parent-teen problem you need help with? Click here to Ask Annie

Read other parents' questions here.
Read teens' letters about parents here.

If you're a teen and you need some help, click here.

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Upcoming Events

In the next two months Annie will be speaking at the following places.

Date Description Location
2/5/05 Superbowl Saturday Parent Education Presentation (culminating event of the City of San Carlos' "Week of the Family"). 1:00-2:30 PM. For information 650 593-0947   San Carlos, CA
2/24/05 Jewish Community High School of the Bay Parent Education Night Presentation "Too Stressed to Think? How to stay sane, loving, and rational when your teens drive you crazy." 7:00-9:00 PM. For information 415 345-9777  San Francisco, CA
3/2/05 Carlmont High School Parent Education Night Presentation "Why 21st Century Teens Need 21st Century Parenting" 7:00-8:30 PM. For information 415 600-5045   Belmont, CA
3/9/05 Free Public Event! Benicia Public Library "Too Stressed to Think?" Workshop for teens. 6:30-8:00 PM. For information call 707 746-4343  Benicia, CA
3/15/05 Free Public Event! Ross Valley School District's Healthy Choices Committee presents "Why 21st Century Kids Need 21st Century Parenting" White Hill School, 7:00-9:00 PM. For information 415 454-8390 Fairfax, CA
3/24/05 Citizens Schools "Too Stressed To Think?" Workshop for tweens and teens. 3pm- 4:45 pm. McKinley Institute of Technology Middle School. For information 650 562-0961  Redwood City, CA

If you want Annie to speak at your event or conference, click here.

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Hey Terra (www.AnnieFox.com) – includes letters from teens and parents, Parent Forum articles past and present, information about Annie's books, and workshops/seminars.

The InSite (www.TheInSite.org) – created especially for teens who have ever thought about making a difference. The InSite provides teens with the information, the inspiration, and many possible game plans so they can take charge of their choices and their lives.

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