Annie Fox for Parents...

Parent Forum – Bookshelf

Recommended Parenting Books

''How Much is Enough? Everything you need to know to steer clear of overindulgence and raise likeable, responsible and respectful children - from toddlers to teens'' by Jean Illsely Clarke, Connie Dawson, David Bredehoft

How Much is Enough? Everything you need to know to steer clear of overindulgence and raise likeable, responsible and respectful children – from toddlers to teens
by Jean Illsely Clarke, Connie Dawson, David Bredehoft

At first glance I thought this was yet another book about affluent parents giving materially to their already entitled kids and thus warping their character development. I was wrong. The type of overindulgence the authors write about here has little to do with a parent’s earning power.

With data from extensive research amongst adults who deemed themselves “overindulged” as children, the authors identified the different ways in which well-meaning parents can make huge mistakes raising kids. It also discusses the ramifications of such mistakes and offers clear guidelines for preventing them.

As the authors so wisely point out:
Over-functioning parents raise under-functioning kids.

Overindulgence is when your parenting choices do not match your parenting goals. You want your children to grow into likeable, responsible and respectful adults. But when you overindulge and do too much of what kids ought to be doing on their own, or when you offer your kids squishy family rules AKA “soft structure” you do your children a disservice without meaning to. As a result, the kids suffer by not developing as they should. They are less confident, less able to trust their own decision-making skills, less able to set a goal and achieve it, less able to deal with frustration and resolve conflicts. As the authors so wisely point out: “over-functioning parents raise under-functioning kids.”

How Much is Enough? is a terrific handbook for parents of any age child. I loved the use of scenarios to demonstrate what is and what is not over-indulgence. (It’s not always what it appears to be to the casual observer.) Likewise I enjoyed the clear language and the 4 question “test” for over-indulgent parenting, the first question of which is “Does it prevent the child for mastering age appropriate tasks?” For example, when the loving Dad carries his 4-year-old daughter into preschool, hangs up her coat and puts her lunch in her cubby for her, is he preventing her from mastering age appropriate tasks? If she can walk, you bet he is! Same goes for the well-meaning mom who continues to take responsibility for getting her 15-year-old son out of bed and to school on time even to the detriment of her own sanity and on-time arrival at work. Both are clear cases of over-indulgence. If you recognize yourself or someone you know in there, you’d find this a very valuable read.

More Recommended Parenting Books »

---------

Got a parent-teen problem you need help with?
Click here to Ask Annie


Find Annie Fox: Find Annie on Facebook Find Annie on Twitter Find Annie on Pinterest Find Annie on YouTube Find Annie on Google+ Find Annie on LinkedIn Find Annie on Goodreads Find Annie on Quora
What's New?
''The Influence of Teachers: Reflections on Teaching and Leadership'' by John Merrow
New Book Review
''The Girls Q&A Book on Friendship: 50 Ways to Fix a Friendship Without the DRAMA'' by Annie Fox, M.Ed., illustrated by Erica De Chavez ''Teaching Kids to Be Good People'' by Annie Fox, M.Ed. “People Are Like Lollipops” by Annie Fox, Illustrated by Brian Narelle
“People Are Like Lollipops” iBook by Annie Fox, Illustrated by Brian Narelle available on the iBookstore
Download ''Are We Lost?'' on Kindle
“People Are Like Lollipops” by Annie Fox, Illustrated by Brian Narelle, Print Edition available on CreateSpace
Books and Apps for Kids
''Are We Lost?'' by Annie Fox, Illustrated by Eli Noyes
Download ''Are We Lost?'' on Kindle
''Are We Lost?'' by Annie Fox, Illustrated by Eli Noyes, Print Edition available on CreateSpace
''Are You My Friend?'' by Annie Fox, Illustrated by Eli Noyes
''Are You My Friend?'' iBook by Annie Fox, Illustrated by Eli Noyes available on the iBookstore
''Are You My Friend?'' by Annie Fox, Illustrated by Eli Noyes, Print Edition available on CreateSpace
Books & Apps for Teens
''Middle School Confidential 3: What's Up With My Family?'' iOS app ''Middle School Confidential 2: Real Friends vs. the Other Kind'' iOS app ''Middle School Confidential 1: Be Confident in Who You Are'' iOS app ''The Teen Survival Guide to Dating & Relating: Real-World Advice on Guys, Girls, Growing Up, and Getting Along'' by Annie Fox M.Ed.
''Middle School Confidential, Book 3: What's Up with My Family?'' by Annie Fox, Illustrated by Matt Kindt
''Middle School Confidential, Book 2: Real Friends vs. The Other Kind'' by Annie Fox M.Ed., Illustrated by Matt Kindt
''Middle School Confidential, Book 1: Be Confident in Who You Are'' by Annie Fox, Illustrated by Matt Kindt
''Too Stressed to Think? A Teen Guide to Staying Sane When Life Makes You CRAZY'' by Annie Fox, M.Ed. and Ruth Kirschner