Parents:
“Should 7th graders be allowed to date in groups?”

Hey Terra,

My son and a friend of his are both in 7th grade. They want to ask 2 girls in their class to go to the movies. We, the parents, would drive them to and from the theater, so there wouldn't be any opportunity to wander. When I was their age we used to go to the movies or bowling in unchaperoned groups, so I didn't see a problem until the other boy's parents said they felt the boys were too young to "date". I just thought it would be a nice way for the kids to go out together outside of school and try out this new experience. Now, I'm not sure what to think. Any advice?

Why Not?

Dear Why Not?,

Parental attitudes vary tremendously. Personally, I don't see anything wrong with 7th grade boys and girls going to a matinee of an age appropriate film. I agree that it sounds like a nice way to give them some independence while still keeping the logistics within your control.

But it doesn't really matter what I think since my son isn't the one going with yours. If the other boys' parents are uncomfortable with the idea, it's not your place to convince them. Their attitudes and values need to be respected and that means you shouldn't undermine them in front of your son (since he's likely to tell his friend what you've said).

Even if this double date doesn't work out as planned, your son will know that you supported the idea. That's very valuable.

I hope this helps.

In friendship,

Annie

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