Annie Fox for Teens... Hey, Terra!

Annie (AKA Hey Terra!) has been around long enough to have experienced a lot of what Life can dish out. But, it hasn’t been so long that she's forgotten what it's like to be your age. Check out some of the thousands of email questions teens from around the world have sent to Terra. You may learn something useful from her answers:

Parents:
“I'll never talk to my parents about this.”

Hey Terra,

I'm 14 years old and lately, well actually like this past year, I've been feeling like sh** and I have nausea all the time. There's something wrong with my menstrual cycle. I feel lonely, helpless, angry, cry over stupid things. I feel like I have no friends. I feel so depressed. I even smoke or drink when I get really sad. I just don't know what to do. I know I'll never talk to my parents cause they think my life is perfect. What should I do Terra?

Depressed

Dear Depressed,

You need to talk to your parents ASAP. Nausea "all the time" and a messed up menstrual cycles are signs coming loud and clear from your body that something's not right. Your body is very tuned into your emotions and since you've been feeling "lonely, helpless, angry, and weepy" well... there are two very strong signs that you're off balance. And you need help.

I'm also guessing that the longer you try to keep these health and emotional problems secret from your parents, the harder it's going to get to pretend that everything is "perfect." Pretending is stressful. More stress is not what you need.

You sound like a very smart girl. Be smart about this. Quit pretending you're okay when you're clearly not. Give your parents a chance to do their job... which is to help you feel better psychologically and emotionally. If you don't talk to them honestly about what's going on (and if you continue being a good actress) then how are they supposed to know you need help?? And is it really fair then to blame them for not being there for you if you never give them a chance to be there for you?

As for for the drinking and smoking, that's just stupid. Sorry for being harsh, but like I said, you're a smart girl... You've got to know that drugs and alcohol are NOT going to help you feel good again.

Talk to your parents today. Can you do that? Can you say, "Mom, Dad, I've got to talk to you about something." Then tell them what you told me about your physical and emotional symptoms. (Leave out the drinking and smoking part for now if you think you should.) You should not be dealing with this alone for one more day. I'm concerned about your health and your well-being.

Talk to your parents. OK, sweetie?

I care about you.

In friendship,

Terra


Need some advice? Write to Terra. She'll give you a straight answer you can trust without any lectures.


What's New?
''The Girls Q&A Book on Friendship: 50 Ways to Fix a Friendship Without the DRAMA'' by Annie Fox, M.Ed., illustrated by Erica De Chavez Books & Apps for Teens
''Middle School Confidential 3: What's Up With My Family?'' iOS app ''Middle School Confidential 2: Real Friends vs. the Other Kind'' iOS app ''Middle School Confidential 1: Be Confident in Who You Are'' iOS app ''The Teen Survival Guide to Dating & Relating: Real-World Advice on Guys, Girls, Growing Up, and Getting Along'' by Annie Fox M.Ed.
''Middle School Confidential, Book 3: What's Up with My Family?'' by Annie Fox, Illustrated by Matt Kindt
''Middle School Confidential, Book 2: Real Friends vs. The Other Kind'' by Annie Fox M.Ed., Illustrated by Matt Kindt
''Middle School Confidential, Book 1: Be Confident in Who You Are'' by Annie Fox, Illustrated by Matt Kindt
''Too Stressed to Think? A Teen Guide to Staying Sane When Life Makes You CRAZY'' by Annie Fox, M.Ed. and Ruth Kirschner