Parent Forum
Welcome to Annie Fox’s Parent Forum — online education and support for parents raising tweens and teens. At times, your job is the toughest in the world. That’s true, in part, because your daughters and sons may be pushing back hard, trying to convince you that they’ve got it all figured out. They don’t. Not yet. Your 21st century teens still need you. To lead them effectively, you need 21st century parenting skills.
So read my blog, and Q & A from other parents, check out my Parenting Tips and my essays. Have a listen to my new podcast series “Family Confidential: Secrets of Successful Parenting” where I interview authors of exciting new parenting books. Or send me a question. You’ll get straightforward advice that you can use immediately to create healthier relationships in your family. That’s going to translate into more trust, respect, honesty, and open communication at home. Sounds like something we’d all like more of, right?
Annie’s Blog:
Days 12-16: Now I get it
June 24, 2009
OK, folks, I'm officially ending the Annoyance Challenge. Tell you the truth there were aspects of this assignment that really bugged me. I know, I brought it on myself. But still, it's a pain to have to blog every day, not that I did it every single day, as evidenced in the title of today's post. But even so, it was annoying not to blog every day knowing that I really should. All that left me battling against my own commitment which resulted in guilt for not keeping my word to thousands of readers.
Which brings me to another aspect of this project... I have no idea if anyone was following any of this. It's one thing to knock yourself out daily, looking for annoying situations and people, just so you can deconstruct and write about your feelings for the self-improvement of all. But to do it for an empty house!
"Really," I say to myself, "What's the point of that?"
"The point, Annie," I reply with as much patience and compassion as I can muster, "Is that you wanted (and needed) to learn more about your own response to annoyance."
Annie: "Why did I need two weeks of lessons on that? I don't even get annoyed all that often."
Annie: "Yeah, right."
Of course I was right and I finally admitted it, but not until I got rather annoyed with myself for being so... well, you know.
Anyway, here's what I learned from this challenge. (Cue the Big Take Away drum roll, please)
I feel annoyed with others when I've got some unexpressed emotion right below the surface. The hidden emotion is usually anger, hurt, or fear. Funny thing... while the annoyance seems to be very directed at whomever is in my vicinity... the more authentic emotion that's being covered up may have nothing to do with anyone else.
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