Annie Fox for Teens... Hey, Terra!

Hi there… How’s it going? Probably not all that great or you wouldn’t be here looking for help. No worries. Teens have been emailing me since 1997 because I give good advice. If you’ve got a problem with friends, so-called friends, a bf/gf, a parent, or anything else… email me. I can help you sort out your feelings. No matter what’s going on, you always have choices. And choices matter because sometimes the stuff we do to “fix” a problem only makes things worse. You don’t want to go there. Instead, let me help you figure out your next best move

In friendship,
Terra (aka Annie Fox)

From Terra’s Inbox

“Is there any way that I can snag my crush?”

 

“I can't figure out who I am.”

Hey Terra,

I liked this guy last year, you could even call me obsessed. But I wasn't the only one, I was in "competition" with five other girls!!!! Thanks to my friends, the ENTIRE grade knew, even the guy himself.

The summer passed, I met new people, so when September rolled around and it was the first time I saw him in like three months. I didn't feel that love "sensation" (heart racing, faster pulse, irregular breathing), so it's clear to say I got over him. The guy knew it too. I didn't hurry to my next class to see him in the halls. I didn't stare endlessly at him in band and at lunch. You see,...

 

Hey Terra,

I'm lost in life and I just don't seem to know how to get on the right path. I don't even know who I am or my personality or anything. Everything is just closed up and the paths are blocked off. I can't even figure out what kinda person I am. I've always wanted to be the perfect person or like my friends cuz they are all better than me. It's because they get the guys I like, especially the guy I like right now who likes this other girl. And then they are prettier than me and popular and I'm like a geek and a nerd and a loser and just a horrible person. They have better hair and better skin...

Read Terra’s Answer » Read Terra’s Answer »

Read more teen letters from Terra’s Inbox »

Annie’s Blog:
How come I don't have a boyfriend yet?!

July 10, 2016

When is it my turn to be loved? When is it my turn to be loved?

If you really want a bf/gf, but don't have one, and everyone else does, it can bring you down. You may wonder, "What's wrong with me?" I totally remember feeling this way in high school. It sucked. Once you buy a ticket to ride that depressing train of thought, you'll assume you don't have enough of whatever you think you need to be loved. ("I'm not hot enough, not cool enough, not thin enough, not buff enough, not outgoing enough, etc. etc. etc.")

So I understand what's going on when I get an email like this one:

Hey Terra -

I shouldn't be upset about this but I am. I'm going to be 16 soon and I've never had a boyfriend or even had a guy ask me out. I'm worried I'll be unprepared for a real committed relationship and be forever alone. I really want to know what that teenager rush of young love feels like that so many of my friends have experienced. What do I do? - Ms. Loveless

Dear Ms. Loveless,

I understand where you’re coming from. But please don’t assume that teen relationships prepare you for “real” committed adult relationships based on mutual trust, respect, honesty, shared values, open communication. They rarely do. You need to be an adult to have an adult relationship. As intelligent and mature as you seem to be, you are still becoming an adult, not there yet. You are still a full-time student, still living in your parents' home, being supported and supervised by them. More »


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What's New?
''The Girls Q&A Book on Friendship: 50 Ways to Fix a Friendship Without the DRAMA'' by Annie Fox, M.Ed., illustrated by Erica De Chavez Books & Apps for Teens
''Middle School Confidential 3: What's Up With My Family?'' iOS app ''Middle School Confidential 2: Real Friends vs. the Other Kind'' iOS app ''Middle School Confidential 1: Be Confident in Who You Are'' iOS app ''The Teen Survival Guide to Dating & Relating: Real-World Advice on Guys, Girls, Growing Up, and Getting Along'' by Annie Fox M.Ed.
''Middle School Confidential, Book 3: What's Up with My Family?'' by Annie Fox, Illustrated by Matt Kindt
''Middle School Confidential, Book 2: Real Friends vs. The Other Kind'' by Annie Fox M.Ed., Illustrated by Matt Kindt
''Middle School Confidential, Book 1: Be Confident in Who You Are'' by Annie Fox, Illustrated by Matt Kindt
''Too Stressed to Think? A Teen Guide to Staying Sane When Life Makes You CRAZY'' by Annie Fox, M.Ed. and Ruth Kirschner