Annie Fox for Teens... Hey, Terra!

Hi there… How’s it going? Probably not all that great or you wouldn’t be here looking for help. No worries. Teens have been emailing me since 1997 because I give good advice. If you’ve got a problem with friends, so-called friends, a bf/gf, a parent, or anything else… email me. I can help you sort out your feelings. No matter what’s going on, you always have choices. And choices matter because sometimes the stuff we do to “fix” a problem only makes things worse. You don’t want to go there. Instead, let me help you figure out your next best move

In friendship,
Terra (aka Annie Fox)

From Terra’s Inbox

“My best friend of five years has just decided to end our friendship.”

 

“My friend smokes pot but it doesn't bother me.”

Hey Terra,

My best friend of five years has just decided to end our friendship. She claims that I constantly destroy her self-esteem. She also claims that we don't get along anymore. We have only had one spat in all our five years of friendship, and I have done nothing to hurt her self-esteem. In fact, I always try to support her and tell her how wonderful she is. I am usually there to pick up the pieces after she is hurt. I don't understand why she would accuse me of things I have never done, and I don't understand why she says we don't get along anymore. She never allowed the friendship to push...

 

Hey Terra,

One of my friends smokes pot, but it doesn't interfere with our friendship whatsoever, and I love that. But I think I upset him, because one time he asked me if I wanted to get high, and I thought he was kidding so I said "no!" in kind of a snobby way and he got really mad! If I knew he was serious, I would've been nicer. It happened a while ago, but it still bugs me. How do I bring it up and apologize to him without sounding like it bothers me that he smokes?

Smokeless Friend

Read Terra’s Answer » Read Terra’s Answer »

Read more teen letters from Terra’s Inbox »

Annie’s Blog:
How come I don't have a boyfriend yet?!

July 10, 2016

When is it my turn to be loved? When is it my turn to be loved?

If you really want a bf/gf, but don't have one, and everyone else does, it can bring you down. You may wonder, "What's wrong with me?" I totally remember feeling this way in high school. It sucked. Once you buy a ticket to ride that depressing train of thought, you'll assume you don't have enough of whatever you think you need to be loved. ("I'm not hot enough, not cool enough, not thin enough, not buff enough, not outgoing enough, etc. etc. etc.")

So I understand what's going on when I get an email like this one:

Hey Terra -

I shouldn't be upset about this but I am. I'm going to be 16 soon and I've never had a boyfriend or even had a guy ask me out. I'm worried I'll be unprepared for a real committed relationship and be forever alone. I really want to know what that teenager rush of young love feels like that so many of my friends have experienced. What do I do? - Ms. Loveless

Dear Ms. Loveless,

I understand where you’re coming from. But please don’t assume that teen relationships prepare you for “real” committed adult relationships based on mutual trust, respect, honesty, shared values, open communication. They rarely do. You need to be an adult to have an adult relationship. As intelligent and mature as you seem to be, you are still becoming an adult, not there yet. You are still a full-time student, still living in your parents' home, being supported and supervised by them. More »


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What's New?
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