Annie Fox for Teens... Hey, Terra!

Annie (AKA Hey Terra!) has been around long enough to have experienced a lot of what Life can dish out. But, it hasn’t been so long that she's forgotten what it's like to be your age. Check out some of the thousands of email questions teens from around the world have sent to Terra. You may learn something useful from her answers:

“I don't trust my mom's boyfriend.”
(Continued)

Hey Terra,

My mom came in to my room last night and explained why she had gotten so angry. I was still upset because I felt as if her boyfriend was trying to replace my dad. (I know that's not the case, but it still feels that way.) I cried and when I made a statement (not a mean one) she would get a louder voice but then she settled down.

As for the meals, now that I know that hunger stresses you out I will take care of myself and get the right rest and eat properly.

Thank you so much... and I think me and my mom have worked things out!!

Much Happier Girl

Dear Much Happier Girl,

I'm so glad to hear that you and your mom are communicating better. I'm proud of you for making the effort to be so honest with her. I'm proud of her for really listening to what you had to say.

Just to let you know, stress is something that often trips up people. So even though you and your mom have had a wonderful breakthrough in your communication don't be surprised if some time in the not too distant future you two have another conversation that doesn't go as well as the last one. We're all human beings and we make mistakes. It comes with the territory. But the good news is that you've told her the truth of your feelings about her boyfriend and how it makes you feel when she gets angry and defensive in that way. From now on, if you can recognize when you're not communicating, it's going to be MUCH EASIER to get a conversation back on track.

The key is staying CALM. And when you find yourself about to lose it, take some slow deep breaths and get yourself back in balance. Only when you're calm and speaking respectfully to your mom, will you be able to remind her (and yourself) that the two of you love each other and have what it takes to communicate clearly and effectively.

Getting the rest you need and the good food is also going to do wonders for your mood.

Take care and be well.

In friendship,

Terra


Need some advice? Write to Terra. She'll give you a straight answer you can trust without any lectures.


Find Annie Fox: Find Annie on Facebook Find Annie on Twitter Find Annie on Pinterest Find Annie on YouTube Find Annie on Google+ Find Annie on LinkedIn Find Annie on Goodreads Find Annie on Quora
What's New?
''The Girls Q&A Book on Friendship: 50 Ways to Fix a Friendship Without the DRAMA'' by Annie Fox, M.Ed., illustrated by Erica De Chavez Books & Apps for Teens
''Middle School Confidential 3: What's Up With My Family?'' iOS app ''Middle School Confidential 2: Real Friends vs. the Other Kind'' iOS app ''Middle School Confidential 1: Be Confident in Who You Are'' iOS app ''The Teen Survival Guide to Dating & Relating: Real-World Advice on Guys, Girls, Growing Up, and Getting Along'' by Annie Fox M.Ed.
''Middle School Confidential, Book 3: What's Up with My Family?'' by Annie Fox, Illustrated by Matt Kindt
''Middle School Confidential, Book 2: Real Friends vs. The Other Kind'' by Annie Fox M.Ed., Illustrated by Matt Kindt
''Middle School Confidential, Book 1: Be Confident in Who You Are'' by Annie Fox, Illustrated by Matt Kindt
''Too Stressed to Think? A Teen Guide to Staying Sane When Life Makes You CRAZY'' by Annie Fox, M.Ed. and Ruth Kirschner