Annie Fox for Teens... Hey, Terra!

Annie (AKA Hey Terra!) has been around long enough to have experienced a lot of what Life can dish out. But, it hasn’t been so long that she's forgotten what it's like to be your age. Check out some of the thousands of email questions teens from around the world have sent to Terra. You may learn something useful from her answers:

“What will I do if my mom finds out that I'm cutting?”

Hey Terra,

I am doing it because it makes me feel better when I'm stressed or upset. I started before I knew my friends were doing it. My mom reacted negatively when she found out that some of my friends were cutting, like saying I couldn't hang out with them. She says that they are weak, selfish, and immature for doing it. So I'm thinking, if she feels this way about them, she'll probably feel the same way about me if she finds out that I'm doing it. I want to know what you think I should do when/if she finds out. Should I try and explain when I know she'll never come close to understanding how I feel, or are there other options?

Lying Lines

Dear Lying Lines,

You say that cutting makes you feel "better when you're stressed or upset." It's totally normal to want to feel better at those times, but you're a smart girl and you've got to know that cutting isn't a healthy way to relieve stress.

I disagree with your mom. I don't think that your friends are "weak, selfish, immature, etc." Not at all! I think they are troubled and don't know what else to do when they're overwhelmed by certain feelings.

They need help.

If you don't know what else to do when you feel that way, then I'd say you need help too.

Would you be interested in finding some other, healthier ways besides cutting to help you deal with stress and intense emotions?

I sure hope so, because if you continue doing this, I guarantee that whatever problems you've got are going to get worse.

Check out this link.

I hope this helps.

And so to answer your question, "What should I do if my mother finds out?" Don't wait until she finds out. Tell her what's going on. Be honest with your mom so she can help you get the help you need to be happier.

In friendship,


Need some advice? Write to Terra. She'll give you a straight answer you can trust without any lectures.

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